Cigarettes and Sarriball

After weeks of waiting for the inevitable to happen, the daily tweets from ITKs that it would be a done deal in 48 hours that have been popping up since June, it was only in the last week after the close of a World Cup that distracted from the unfolding shambles, that the supposed inevitable actually came to pass. Antonio Conte, purportedly insistent on fulfilling the last 12 months of his contract despite knowing he wasn’t wanted at the club, had to take the first days of pre-season, before being shown the door as soon as the Is and Ts were dotted and crossed on Mauricio Sarri’s signature on his contract.

Tactician and chain-smoker, Mauricio Sarri won't be able to smoke on the touchline at Stamford Bridge

Ipswich 0-1 Wolves; Post-Match Reaction

With a free Saturday and Chelsea not playing, I found myself making the short train journey from Colchester to Ipswich to take in a game at Portman Road. I’d promised myself when I went to University that I’d try and go to all the Football League grounds in the Essex and East Anglia at least once. After going to Colchester (thrice) and Southend, as well as two trips up to Norwich with Chelsea, the last on the list to tick off were the Tractor Boys. And what better time to so, than the visit of high flying Wolves, who look to have all but confirmed promotion already with an 11 point lead on third place before kick-off on Saturday.

The teams walk out pre-kickoff to a half-empty Portman Road

Young, Gifted & Black: Black Managers and the Rooney Rule

On April 13th 2017, Daniel Milton Rooney, the former United States ambassador to Ireland, passed away in his native Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. This man is probably the most unlikely figure to be such, but he may just turn out to be a key figure in the turning point for the chase of equality for black coaches in English football. This is because in his role as Pittsburgh Steelers owner (following on from his father Art Rooney - both no relation to Wayne), he enacted a rule which ensured that in interviews for Head Coach positions, at least one ‘minority’ (what is now termed in the UK as BAME – Black, Asian, Minority Ethnic) coach must also be interviewed. This policy was enacted across the NFL in 2003, and with positive results: within just 3 years, the percentage of African-American coaches in the NFL had jumped from 6% in 2003 to 22% in 2006. The Steelers themselves employed their first African-American Head Coach, Mike Tomlin, in 2007, who has gone on to reach 7 post-seasons in 9 years, including winning Super Bowl XLIII. Due to the success of this, many coaches, pundits, and activists have been calling for The FA to bring this rule into English football. Everyone can support the sentiment behind enacting such a policy, however, do the differences between the systems used by the NFL and English football present a barrier to this policy being of any practical use?

Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink, one of four BAME managers currently in the Football League, currently at Northampton Town

Should old acquaintance be forgot…

As most other clubs rang in the New Year with the traditional round of games on the first day of the year itself, television rescheduling means Chelsea have had to wait until the third to open their account for 2018 (as it seems nowadays that calendar year statistics are all important) away at the Emirates. This additional waiting period provides some downtime to assess the important months that are to come. A new year means the beginning of the real crux of the season. Any team worth their salt and competing on all fronts will be playing twice a week every week from here on in – something Chelsea must do. It also means the opening of the January transfer window, and enough rumour to put Fleetwood Mac to shame.

Two-goal Marcos Alonso celebrates his second against Spurs in front of the away end 

A Youth Explosion – England’s Year Of Success

This is the modern world. A world in which young English footballers are the best in the world. This is something fans, pundits and coaches have been dreaming of for the decade since that disastrous qualifying campaign for Euro 2008. Rather than just the one golden generation of Terry, Ferdinand, Lampard, Gerrard and Rooney; England seem to have several age groups full of top talent at their disposal. An unprecedented summer of success in under-age tournaments, not just for England but for any nation ever, should be something celebrated, that gives hope for the future. However, the pessimism of a footballing nation created by what are now 52 years of hurt, combined with the experiences in recent years for promising youngsters in the English game, is understandable.

England U17s lift the World Cup in Kolkata

That Toddlin' Town: Schweinsteiger to Chicago Fire a perfect match

After a period of big name players leaving the MLS, like Didier Drogba, Frank Lampard and Steven Gerrard, the MLS are attracting the big names from Europe yet again. World Cup and Champions League winner Bastian Schweinsteiger's move to Chicago Fire was confirmed on Wednesday, with the grandiose official unveiling taking place, as well as a mass swarming of fans at O'Hare Airport upon his arrival from Manchester United the day before. This move is one that is perfect for all three parties involved: Schweinsteiger himself, Chicago Fire as a club, and the MLS as a League.

Bastian Schweinsteiger is welcomed to Chicago Fire in his unveiling press conference

MK Ultra: Will the advent of the MK Dons benefit the England national team?

During the October international break, and the two snooze-fests of England games during them, the significant yet under-reported fact of AFC Wimbledon overtaking Milton Keynes Dons in league position for the first time in their histories. This was a fantastic achievement for the side from Kingsmeadow, as of course many know the evocative story behind this. Tonight, Britain’s most unusual derby (if it can be called that) will have its second outing in a league game, with MK running out 1-0 winners at Stadium:MK in the reverse fixture in December. Seeing this pop up on my Twitter timeline, it got me thinking: how will this controversial chapter affect the long-term future of English football at national team level? MK Dons have a squad full of talented youngsters, many of whom are probably good enough to make the step up - as proven by the stunning debut season of Dele Alli at Tottenham last year, and his continued good form this. With the New Town of Milton Keynes being a previously untapped area for footballers before the controversial events of 2002’s independent commission, does this mean that those events may actually be good for the future of the English national team?

Milton Keynes's most famous son celebrates scoring a goal at Bramall Lane

Josh McEachran: The Prodigal Son Returns

At 17, he had the world at his feet. Having rejected offers from Real Madrid and Manchester United, he had made his debut for Chelsea, and had been mightily impressive. Being used off the bench often, and not only when the game was already won, either. Slowly, this began to turn into starts, including one away in the Champions League group stages at the notoriously imposing Stade Velodrome. Then this all changed. The manager who had been willing to use him, and excited at the prospect he could be, was sacked, and in came one who despite being charged with turning the aging squad around, loaned one of the best young prospects out. One loan turned into another, and loan after loan, manager after manager who promised game time to choose that club to join and then didn’t give him game time, or when he did, did it in a position or system that didn’t suit his qualities. Soon, the boy wonder that was billed to be the English Xavi, was being sold to the Championship for a transfer fee under a million pounds.

 

Josh McEachran in first team action in the 2010/11 season under Carlo Ancelotti

“We’re top of the League!” - Antonio’s 3-4-3

It’s quickly becoming the most wonderful time of year, when with the nights starting earlier and earlier even the 3 o’clock kick offs turning into floodlit games, and balls that are neon yellow instead of the traditional white. It is also the time of year where the league tables begin to take shape, and this year it’s shaping up to be one of the tightest title races in Premier League history. The form side, without a doubt, are Chelsea. 7 league wins on the bounce, complete with 19 goals and 6 clean sheets in a row before last weekend, and that’s without going into the glorious detail of explaining the manner of those wins and the way in which we played. All this after a switch of formation from 4-3-3 to 3-4-3 by Antonio Conte, and one that has seemed to have taken the league by storm, and become the new formation in vogue.

Pedro celebrates his goal within 30 seconds against Man United by jumping into the Matthew Harding Lower

Kanté’s Inferno

With the Premier League season rapidly coming to its second week, it’s an exciting time for any football fan, but it feels particularly good to be a Chelsea fan. A new manager, with a new system and style of play, and two vital new signings; all this makes for a desperately needed breath of fresh air into a squad that was stunningly stale in the worst title defence in the Premier League era last season. And as shown on Monday night, things are seemingly coming into fruition, with all the aforementioned new things at the club slotting into place almost perfectly from the off.

Antonio Conte celebrates with the Chelsea fans after Diego Costa's late winner on Monday night

King Power: Leicester City’s Astounding Season

“Foxes Never Quit” is the motto emblasoned above the King Power Stadium tunnel, glanced upon by the likes of Jamie Vardy and Riyad Mahrez before running out and performing in the manner they have done this season. The motto, it’s been shown, is clearly apt. All season, the entirety of Football had expected Leicester to fall away, yet they didn’t. It seems that those Foxes, in fact, do not quit; indeed, they have managed to outfox all the teams in the Premier League bar one: that one being Arsenal, one of two teams to have beaten Leicester in the League, and the only to have done the double over them. However, Arsenal managed to outfox themselves out of Title contention, and only their North London rivals Spurs had any hope of catching Claudio Ranieri’s side, and those were ended by Ranieri’s old side Chelsea at Stamford Bridge. Champion status not only guarantees Champions League football, but also Top Seed status in the Group Stage draw. All this means that Europe’s Elite are returning to the East Midlands for the first time since Brian Clough’s famous Nottingham Forest side won the European Cup twice in a row in 1979 and 1980. Comparison with that Forest side has been common this season, and isn’t that far off the mark. Forest are the last English side to win the First Division the season after being promoted from the Second, a record that doesn’t look like being changed in the modern era; Leicester this season is possibly the closest thing we’ll get to that in the foreseeable future.

Claudio Ranieri and Wes Morgan lift the Premier League trophy after their last home game, a 3-1 win over Everton

The Future of Football Tactics

The number 10. For many, this is just a simple number, like any other. For a football addict such as myself, the first thing that crops to mind, rather than times tables, are trequartistas. Only a football fan can describe a number nine as false. The triggering of some sort of OCD when anyone but a left back wears the number 3 on their shirt. Yet this obsession with numbers stems from something far more complicated than squad numbers or numeracy: the world of the football tactic. Football is often like the world of fashion; things are often in vogue and then back out very rapidly. Nothing more so than tactics. A successful formation that is truly original stays so for a very short period of time, before admirers and rivals take ‘inspiration’ and copy it, sometimes improving upon it, but often never getting close to the original. When the next sure-fire way to win crops up, it’s out with the old and in with the new. There are numerous examples of this, such as the libero of European football. The sweeper has not been used commonly by big clubs since the early to mid-90s, with the back four far more common. In the modern game, a back four is almost a given, albeit the manner in which it is used (flat back four or wingbacks, low or high block, etc) changes, it’s what is ahead of this that is the interesting bit.

(Stamford) Bridge Over Troubled Water

We may have lost at the Britannia, and been saved by a Willian free kick once again at home to Dynamo Kiev, but there are signs of improvement, and positives can be taken. It’s a cliché that’s often trotted out for teams near the bottom of the table battling against relegation; however considering that we’re 16^th after 12 games, it’s probably applicable. When looking at the games we’ve played since the last international break (and the last article I wrote with a song title reference), the performances have been slightly less dire, less infuriatingly poor.

Loic Remy hits the ball wide after his leap over Butland and subsequent slip

Chelsea 4-0 Maccabi Tel Aviv; Post-Match Reaction

Finally, Chelsea have got their first home win of the season, in last night’s Champions League opener against Israeli side Maccabi Tel Aviv. Former Chelsea players Tal Ben-Haim (of which there were two, the other one a striker), and Slavisa Jokanovic the Maccabi manager, didn’t have many happy memories of their time at Stamford Bridge anyway, and certainly didn’t add to them last night. 

Ruben Loftus-Cheek was awarded the Man of the Match award for his impressive performance

Panic on the streets of (West) London

The international break was both brilliantly and atrociously placed. Brilliant so Jose Mourinho can sit and plan how to turn around this poor start to the season ready for the game at Goodison on Saturday, yet atrocious as it has created an echo chamber on Twitter for moaning about the events of the season so far without the hope of a game soon to come up immediately.

Chelsea players look dejected after Joel Ward seals Palace's win late on

Papy Djilobodji: a buy by any other name would be just as panicked

The title for this piece is a play on a famous Shakespeare quote, but it’s still difficult to determine whether the saga that was Chelsea’s attempts to buy a centre back this transfer window were a tragedy or a comedy.

Papy Djilobodji in action for Nantes, who he left in a 3 million Euro deal

Vote For Pedro: Catalan winger already at home in West London

With under a week to go in the Transfer Window, and the Stones saga set to rumble on for the entirety of that, one comfort to the hordes of moaners on Twitter is that for the first time since the Double winning season of 2009/10, both of our first choice wingers are top class options. Despite not even being here for a full week, Pedro Rodriguez seems at home in West London already.

Pedro rifles the opener home at The Hawthorns

Community Shield 2015 Preview: Chelsea vs Arsenal

After being victorious in the first FA Women’s Cup Final hosted at Wembley, the men’s side could make it a double this weekend with a win in the season’s traditional curtain-raiser. This is Chelsea’s first Community Shield at Wembley since 2010, with the 2012 match vs Man City being played at Villa Park due to the Olympics, whereas Arsenal faced the Citizens last year. And while most may see this as an over-glorified friendly, it’s a chance for silverware at Wembley this early in the season, plus when it’s Chelsea against Arsenal, and Mourinho against Wenger, it’s very rarely friendly.

Chelsea lift the Community Shield after beating Manchester United in 2009

Asmir Begovic: Number 2s and cold Stoke evenings

“Can he do it on a cold Wednesday night in Stoke?” Whilst it may be the second most annoying buzz-phrase on Twitter, after reminding Gary Lineker about his upset stomach at Italia 90, it’s also an apt statement for the signing of Asmir Begovic for Chelsea, after 5 seasons at the Britannia. The Bosnian is about as solid and dependable as a backup keeper can get (other than Petr Cech last season), and in his interview with Chelsea TV seemed enthusiastic and ambitious.

Asmir Begovic holds a scarf at Cobham

Worst kept secret in Football confirmed: Falcao to Chelsea complete

It seems like one of those ballsy twists in a game of Blackjack, when you already have 19; get a two and it’s a brilliant move, get anything higher and you’re stupid. Radamel Falcao to Chelsea can go the same ways as that blackjack move. Rather than stick with Loïc Remy (seemingly linked with every midtable team in the League), Jose Mourinho has twisted by signing Falcao. Having chased him every summer in the past 5 years, Chelsea have finally got their man, but only time will tell if he’ll be worth the money.

Radamel Falcao in action for Colombia

Chelsea 2-4 Bradford City; Post-Match Reaction

So, after much hype of a Quadruple after the draw away to Liverpool in the Capital One Cup semi, any hopes of one occurring were shattered by a genuine shock, as League 1 Bradford came back from 2-0 down to win 4-2 against the Premier League leaders. A shocking performance by Chelsea, but credit has to go to Bradford for an astounding performance; better than that of teams like Maribor and Sporting who have visited in the Champions League. I can’t help but wonder if the Bradford fan I bumped into was gutted about his Chelsea to win 3-0 bet not coming off…

Petr Cech looks on as the ball has just gone in for Bradford's first

Tottenham Hotspur 5-3 Chelsea; Post-Match Reaction

The actual reaction to the match itself will be quite short: Kane good, Chadli good, Hazard good, Costa good, Tottenham defence bad, Chelsea defence worse. Phil Dowd for once had a decent game, and while Jose Mourinho may have blamed the loss on him not giving a penalty for a Jan Vertonghen potential-handball, even I say the decision was a correct one. However, so many players had shocking games: Matic, Fabregas, JT, Oscar, Willian, Ramires… even Jose didn’t have the best day with his subs. But two in particular stood out, and have done so for a while (and not in a good way).

Eden Hazard, despite having one of his best games this season, still ends up on the losing side

Lies, Damned Lies, and Statistics

I’ve been wanting to write this article for a while now. Seeing multiple screenshots of Squawka comparisons posted on Twitter with the wrong stats being used has made my blood boil, and a hatred for Squawka. But, in all fairness, it isn’t Squawka’s fault. People are using the numbers, which I commend Squawka for offering to the general public, in the wrong manner. It’s very easy to sway the statistics used to give the desired output, as I have shown below:

Here, I made Harry Kane look as good a goalkeeper as Courtois and Neuer after his spell in goal in Tottenham’s Europa League tie a few weeks back. Anybody who saw that game, and the goal he conceded, will know that he isn’t as good as the best two goalkeepers in the world, but I’ve managed to find statistics to back up my point. And here’s what the aim of the article is to display; to show that the interpretation of statistics is incorrect and needs to be changed.

The ‘Keeper Conundrum

We’ve been here before, haven’t we? A young goalkeeping prospect comes into our squad and takes the number 1 spot from a cemented fan favourite. Poor old Carlo Cudicini, arguably the best keeper in the league at the time, then had his place taken by some Czech bloke.

A decade later, things have gone full circle. That “Czech bloke” has become undoubtedly the best keeper in the club’s history, and a hero on many an occasion, most notably in Munich. But Thibaut Courtois had proven his worth over in the Colchonero half of Madrid, and deserved his chance in that first game against Burnley.

Thibaut Courtois in action for Chelsea this season, away at Selhurst Park

The Best Deadline Day Ever

Whilst Twitter was rife with “Jim White Day” jokes (subsequently stolen by The LAD Bible), football fans were having hearts in mouths. Well, most anyway. But not Chelsea fans.

Luckily for us Blues, Messrs Mourinho and Emenalo had got their work done efficiently and early, as displayed by our early form. They knew what was needed; replacements for Lampard and Cole, and a top class striker. What did they get? Just that.

Fabregas announces transfer to Chelsea whilst at the World Cup with Spain